Pointless™ is enterprise-grade software engineered from the ground up to accomplish absolutely nothing — faster, more securely, and with better analytics than any competitor's nothing.
A fully-featured platform, meticulously engineered so that nothing you click ever does anything.
Watch your metrics update live, forever at zero.
Invite a teammate. They will not be notified, because nothing happens.
Your data, synced to nowhere, continuously.
Our team responds instantly, unhelpfully.
Toggle any setting. It reverts itself, automatically.
Bank-grade encryption protecting a database that does not exist.
Real companies. None of them have given us a cent — but going by their own track record, neither did most of their investors.
Community-driven nothing, at a $47B valuation nobody could explain.
One drop of nothing, run through hundreds of tests, all of them wrong.
Your funds, securely nowhere. We learned from the best.
$1.75 billion to prove short-form nothing wasn't the future either.
A $400 machine to squeeze a bag that was already doing nothing on its own.
Off-balance-sheet nothing, audited by nobody who was looking.
Late fees on nothing, due approximately twenty years ago.
Unlimited nothing for $9.95/mo, until the math caught up with them.
Revolutionizing standing perfectly still since 2001.
A sock puppet sold nothing to investors, and investors bought it.
An entire social network of nothing, quietly euthanized in 2019.
Still technically operational. Same as us, honestly.
*no sponsorship exists, no money changed hands, and any resemblance to real corporate failure is fully intentional.
Every plan does exactly the same amount: none.
*determined by a random number generator, updated never
Pro costs $0/mo, same as Free. Below is a real, valid Ethereum wallet — generated fresh in your browser, seconds ago, by nobody but you — for sending that $0.00 to.
This keypair is genuine — generated locally with your browser's cryptographically secure RNG, using the same library real wallets use. It never leaves this tab: we don't see it, send it anywhere, or store it. There's exactly $0.00 in it, and per the pricing above, there always will be — but the keys themselves are real. Copy them somewhere safe if you want an actual wallet out of this; refresh this page without copying and they're gone forever, which, honestly, is the more on-brand outcome.
"I used Pointless™ for six months and nothing about my life changed. Would recommend."
"We migrated our entire team to Pointless™. Productivity remained exactly the same."
"Finally, a tool as ambitious as it is useless."
Generate your official, notarized-looking Certificate of Complete Uselessness and show everyone what you didn't accomplish.